Punt

Advice

When you feel like you don't know what to do, clean the garage.

Crapnackle - Proposal 106a

What we have here, is a failure to communicate. I say stop selling into a soft (understatement) market and you continue to do so. What about "stop selling" is hard to understand? Don't make me stop this car. I will you know.

Instead of trying to hurt me with your lack of compliance with my wishes, here's what we'll do. Proposal 106a. I'm going to be calm. I'll come over here and stand with my hands on the back of this chair and my feet spread out as far as can. Then, when I say go, you wind up and drive your foot up between my legs crushing my balls and causing me severe pain.

But if I accept that, you will agree to stop selling and to actually start buying stocks. I won't go so far as to require that you buy specific stocks, although if you need suggestions, I have some.

Fair enough?

Autumn to be "Crunchy"

Crunchy leaves and winds at 12 mph - use caution.

Extreme Weather Alert: Meteorologists Predict Intensely Brisk Autumn

Crapnackle Chimes in - Again

To all people,
Stop selling stocks. Stop it I tell you. Stop it! You're ruining the plan. You see - in order for us to come off these dreadful lows, we need buying. Repeat after me... "Buuuuuyyyyyying". Yes - very good. It's time to quit being chicken and get positive. Buy!

Don't make me beg. Of course I will beg if I have to, but that isn't a fun thing to watch, so let's not let it come to that.

I'll just say, please - if you don't mind etc etc.

There - I've said it. Hopefully that encouragement is the thing that tips the scales. Whew.

Any wiggle room in that price?

Crapnackle Speaks!

Crapnackle Report - September 29. 2008 ~ 10:41 AM:

Now is the time to put money, effort and other applicable resources to work. By now, I mean over the next few months. I'd still give it a couple of weeks for the stench to reach the nasal passages.

Had you done it over the last year, chances are good you lost money. If you were lucky enough or patient enough to wait until now, you stand a chance to do well. The message has been clear for a long time (two years or so) that "the economy" is lousy and getting lousier. There were a few holdouts who kept saying that things would get better.

Now there is almost complete agreement that everything stinks. Most people fear the worst and believe we are going down, down, down. Even those who are always bullish are wincing.

I and almost everyone is sold on the dismal state of everything.

That's it. We'll have a healthy chunk of market hurl today and maybe another nice big upchuck in the next week or so just to emphasise the point and then that will be it. The bottom will have arrived. Thank goodness. Now let's get back to business.

Remember what a bottom looks like. On the other side of the moment there is still a period of more lousy. We'll probably see more pain in the next week or two, but really - who can make a call down to the day? The bottom feeling may last for a while and we may wallow in it for a time, but it is the bottom. It just won't get appreciably lousier. That might not sound all that wonderful, but if you stay away (chicken), and don't act until you see signs of improvement, you'll be competing with everyone. Right now - be bold and win!

There you have it.

Cool Hand Luke

Paul Leonard Newman (January 26, 1925 – September 26, 2008)

In school, I took a film class and we dissected every cut of every scene in the movie "Cool Hand Luke". You had to like Luke.

Hmmm... let's consider

Constructive dilemmas--

1. (If X, then Y) and (If W, then Z).
2. X or W.
3. Therefore, Y or Z.

Destructive dilemmas--

1. (If X, then Y) and (If W, then Z).
2. Not Y or not Z.
3. Therefore, not X or not W.

McCain's Economic plan - "Marry a Beer Heiress"

McCain's Economic Plan For Nation: "Everyone Marry A Beer Heiress"

And That's Why I don't like Cricket

Mighty Boosh - Fossil Dance.

Amateur Balloonist

Amateur balloonist floats around the world.

The Stone Church

Who would have guessed? Not me.
We'll see what we can do. It should be interesting.

Pencils down. When?

Is it time?

What time is it?

When?

Now?

Soon?

Pencils down!

No - not pencils down.

Yes indeed, it's just about time for pencils down.

So - it isn't actually pencils down. How much time is left before the real pencils down?

Not much.

Oh boy.

.

Eventually...

Eventually, home prices will be relatively stable. Somewhere just under what it costs to put up a new one. This will mean that perceptions about puffed values will no longer drive people's decisions. Those with bloated mortgages will simply be "upside-down". They'll accept it as a fact and act accordingly. Some will stiff the bank, and others will find a way to get their positions right. Buyers will buy the homes offered at acceptable prices and walk past the rest. This is just the way it will be.

Lenders will lend money based on the new value reality and they'll be happy to do a 30-year fixed mortgage for folks with some kind of a down payment. There will be much less creativity when it comes to financing.

Some people will rent from those with enough money to control rental properties. There will be some balance between what you get and what you pay for. Of course this will happen.

Oh - and one more thing... Eventually, nuclear power will deliver energy in abundance and demand for fossil fuels will be only for those applications in which it is necessary.

Now then, isn't all that nice to know?

From Brand Camp

Here's a buck - go buy something

Here you go. Here's a dollar. Go buy... almost nothing. You might get a bottle of water. Not a name brand water (what?), but a generic - crappy water in a plastic bottle that will probably give you a disease of some kind. Hey - how about a sandwich at a drive through. Mmmmm... nice huh? But wait - with tax, even that 99 cent "thing" is going to require a little more cash. No, no, no, I know - go get a package of sparklers in New Hampshire (no tax). There you go. Look - five sparklers for a dollar. That's a half hour of real solid fun. What a deal. If you have another dollar, you can get a lighter. You'll have to settle for a stupid looking one that is one-sale because it didn't sell. It probably has a skull on it. Hopefully it will work so you can light up your sparklers. Oh boy, we're having some fun now aren't we?

Sales Bully

Can you bully someone into a sale?

Of course you can.

It's human nature to resist saying yes. Human nature makes us hesitate, sometimes for a week or a month, at the very last minute, at the moment of truth.

One technique to get through this hesitation is to be a sales bully.

Sales bullies describe their approach as ethical, because, after all, it's in the best interest of the prospect to say yes. It's okay to be a sales bully when you're trying to get someone to take their TB medicine, so it must be okay to be a sales bully to get them to sign this contract.

And it works. On some people.

The flaw in thinking is this... the people you most want to sell to won't respond well to this. The people you most need to spread the word, the people who are the best partners, the most loyal customers--they blanch in the face of bullying. They walk out.

So, if bullying is the only tool you've got, it makes sense to focus on an audience that responds to it (and lower your expecations accordingly). Even better, get some new tools.

Nothing But Tears

NEW BRUNSWICK, NJ—After decades of coddling young children, Johnson & Johnson unveiled its new "Nothing But Tears" shampoo this week, an aggressive bath-time product the company says will help to prepare meek and fragile newborns for the real world.

A radical departure for the health goods manufacturer, the new shampoo features an all-alcohol-based formula, has never once been approved by leading dermatologists, and is as gentle on a baby's skin as "having to grow up and fend for your goddamn self."

"We at Johnson & Johnson have been making bath time a safe and soothing experience for far too long," company CEO William C. Weldon said. "Years of pampering have left our newborns helpless, feeble, and ill-equipped for the arduous road ahead."

Nine things to know - coming soon

1. Your lawn and the real story about grass
2. The keys to proper personal hygiene
3. Golf secrets they don't want you to know
4. The truth about choosing PC or a Mac
5. Stocks and investing - the most important thing
6. Trading in (selling) your car
7. Home recording studio myths busted
8. Get rid of that hot tub
9. Time, perception, and the endless summer