Profitable Errors

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Obywon Opportunity Partners LLC

About us:

OOP is the nation's #1 "Profitable Error" consulting firm.

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Double billing, missing credits, odd fees, one time and repeatable mystery charges, billing cycle manipulation, and a long list of clever ways to get extra money from your customers.

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Our client's profitable errors often add 10% or more to the bottom line.

No one's perfect right?

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Why wait? Let us help you to help yourself. Get your share - and a little bit more.

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Remember, if you get caught you can always say:

"Oh... We're terribly sorry"

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Ten Bucks Worth of Quotes, (Hand Selected)

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There is no pleasure in having nothing to do. The pleasure is in having lots to do, and not doing it.
John W. Raper

I'm trying to arrange my life so that I don't even have to be present.
Unknown

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.
Mark Twain

I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.
Steve Martin

Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening at once.
Unknown

The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling.
Paula Poundstone

I have enough money to last the rest of my life, unless I buy something.
Jackie Mason

There is nothing more exhilarating than to be shot at, without results.
Winston Churchill

Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese.
G. K. Chesterton

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila.
Mitch Ratliffe

You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is: Never try.
Homer Simpson

Better stop your groovin' round another rooster's hen.
song lyric by Lee Hazlewood

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Everyone is crazy

Ohhhh ya...

Almost everyone is missing the point
Don't they get it
Maybe it's just me
Maybe it's just me

Almost everyone is crazy
Don't they get it
Maybe it's just me
Maybe it's just me

I don't have the time or the patience anymore
They don't feel the need
Is everyone crazy, but me
Maybe it's just me

More on the Contrail / Chemtrail Hmmm...

Say what?

This video highlights the conspiracy theory discussed in a previous post titled: Chemtrails? Contrails? Conspiracy?

Hmmm...

Time / Summer Time

"Time seems to move so quickly these days".

Actually, time moves at precisely the same pace as always. However as a percent of our total experience, we see it differently.

Why then - when I was a kid, did summer seem to last longer?

A season (let's say summer - I like summer) lasts for three months. At age 50, a season is .005 of my total experience. At age ten it was only .025 of my total experience. So at age ten, summer (as a percent of total experience) was 5 times longer.

There you have it.

Memo to driving ranges

Some of you who own or operate a driving range, have a policy that prohibits people from bringing their golf bags. You want folks to only bring the clubs. Apparently, you're afraid that people will steal your balls. That's silly. If you have another reason, let me know. Send me an email at what@tenbucksworth.com.

Just for the record; if you have this policy, you are most likely a knucklehead. Let me know if you want to get out of the business - perhaps I'll buy it (depending on location and other factors), or maybe I can help you sell it. However, you really should go do something else.

Alternately, you can just let your customers bring their bags.

Stuck?

Cut = Haste
Measure and cut = Notion
Measure twice and cut = Process

Measure many times and cut = Inefficiency
Measure continuously without cutting = Problem

KT Tunstall - Big Black Horse

She is creating loops, probably on a delay modeler of some type. The technology isn't all that amazing, but she's put the performance together well. Nicely done.

Enjoy...

Drawing Board

Aha!

I messed with an idea enough to conclude it was not worth pursuing. "Back to the drawing board" I thought.

Then I realized, I don't have a drawing board. I have paper and such. I have a computer, but I do not have a drawing board. How can one go back the drawing board when there is none?

I must go out and purchase a drawing board. I'm sure this will make quite a difference. Yes indeed.

Happy Ester

Esters are organic compounds in which an organic group (symbolized by R') replaces a hydrogen atom (or more than one) in a hydroxyl group.

Clumsy Natives & Chocolate Clair

Two unheard of bands who may never ever be seen:

Clumsy Natives & Chocolate Clair

They are rumored to be merging.

No say?

Say.


Interesting stuff.

Systemboy

One of your assignments is to keep track of 100 pennies. Unless you continuously monitoring all activity without losing focus, you would have a tough time recognizing when one was missing. You could periodically count them all to verify the original number.

Instead - arrange them 10 by 10 and glance.

Copyright 03-30-2007

Who dat?

One of Billions - no say!

How many galaxies are out there?
In 1999 the Hubble Space Telescope estimated that there were 125 billion galaxies in the universe, and recently with the new camera HST has actually observed 3,000 visible galaxies, which is twice as much as they observed before with the old camera. I'm emphasizing "visible" because observations with radio telescopes, infrared cameras, x-ray cameras, etc. would detect other galaxies that are not detected by Hubble. As observations keep on going and astronomers explore more of our universe, the number of galaxies detected will increase. It's safe to say - there are a lot of galaxies in the universe. Most experts agree that the count is at least in the hundreds of billions. Holy calculator! That is really a lot.

How many solar systems are in a galaxy?
The Sun is one of around 200 billion stars just in the Milky Way galaxy alone. Scientists estimate that there are many billions of solar systems in our galaxy.


So...
Our solar system has 8 or 9 planets (Pluto got demoted). Our solar system is one of about a hundred billion (nobody counted them - it's probably more) solar systems in our galaxy. Our galaxy (Milky Way - did someone pay for the naming rights? What a great idea) is one of several hundred billion in the universe (again, no official count, but the number is a chubby one).

So...
There are billions (and billions) of planets out there? Yup! Almost too many to imagine.

So...
What are the chances that our Earth is the only planet to have developed intelligent life?
What are the chances that human life on this particular planet turns out to be the most advanced and intelligent life form of all?
What are the chances that ours is the only planet to figure out how to escape its own atmosphere and do some traveling?

Some might suggest that the distance between solar systems (long way) and then between galaxies (pack a lunch) make this type of travel less imaginable. Still - even if life (intelligent life) is stuck in another solar system or galaxy (remember there are billions), can we doubt for a second that they exist. Since we may never say hello (or known about it), they may be irrelevant - but can we be silly enough to think we're it?

I'm not.

France just released its previously classified information regarding unexplained activity. It is fascinating stuff.

Michener

The master in the art of living makes little distinction between his work and his play, his labor and his leisure, his mind and his body, his information and his recreation, his love and his religion.
He hardly knows which is which.
He simply pursues his vision of excellence at what ever he does, leaving others to decide whether he is working or playing.
To him he’s always doing both.

James Michener

Technical Difficulty?

Is there a single source where a small business can find:

• Network design that includes wireless access for all Media, Internet, Voice and Data
• Phone Systems (VOIP - or not)


• Integration with proprietary systems if necessary


• Multimedia and home & business theater experience design and installation


• Hardware selection and purchase assistance


• Software selection and purchase assistance


• Installation, setup and testing with professionally installed inconspicuous wiring and racking


• Ongoing maintenance and 24/7 support


• Three levels of security protection


• Off site storage for data and media files with anytime access


• Internet access, web hosting


• Web design


• Custom database programing

Christmas Wishes

Steve Martin:

If I had one wish that I could wish this holiday season, it would be that all the children to join hands and sing together in the spirit of harmony and peace.

If I had two wishes I could make this holiday season, the first would be for all the children of the world to join hands and sing in the spirit of harmony and peace. And the second would be for 30 million dollars a month to be given to me, tax-free in a Swiss bank account.

You know, if I had three wishes I could make this holiday season, the first, of course, would be for all the children of the world to get together and sing, the second would be for the 30 million dollars every month to me, and the third would be for encompassing power over every living being in the entire universe.

And if I had four wishes that I could make this holiday season, the first would be the crap about the kids definitely, the second would be for the 30 million, the third would be for all the power, and the fourth would be to set aside one month each year to have an extended 31-day orgasm, to be brought out slowly by Rosanna Arquette and that model Paulina-somebody, I can't think of her name.

Of course my lovely wife can come too and she's behind me one hundred percent here, I guarantee it. Wait a minute, maybe the sex thing should be the first wish, so if I made that the first wish, because it could all go boom tomorrow, then what do you got, y'know?

No, no, the kids, the kids singing would be great, that would be nice. But wait a minute, who am I kidding? They're not going to be able to get all those kids together. I mean, the logistics of the thing is impossible, more trouble than it's worth! So -- we reorganize!

Here we go. First, the sex thing. We go with that. Second, the money. No, we go with the power second, then the money. And then the kids. Oh wait, oh jeez, I forgot about revenge against my enemies! Okay, I need revenge against all my enemies, they should die like pigs in hell! That would be my fourth wish. And, of course, my fifth wish would be for all the children of the world to join hands and sing together in the spirit of harmony and peace.

Thank you everybody and Merry Christmas.

Poof - You're out

Consumers fire companies quickly and decisively.

"Go ahead and disappoint me. I'll be gone in an instant. You may not even notice my departure - that's how quick it will be. I probably won't bother to complain. That would be like trying to help you. Instead, I'll just vanish into thin air."

Automated Answering

For many companies, automated phone reception makes sense. It can be nicely efficient and useful for the caller. However, you have to do this well. If you don't, you come across as incompetent.

Five Rules:

1. One layer is best. Two if you must. Try to avoid a series of menus. Don't try to do too much.

2. Make sure there is a way for the caller to opt out of the menu system and get to a person immediately. Train that person well. It's not that hard.

3. Make sure the instructions are clearly spoken and accurate.

4. Set up an appropriate alternate menu for after hours (if applicable)

5. Periodically test your own system by calling and trying all transfers.

Voting

Many people vote for the candidate who's victory and subsequent policies they believe will help them financially. Still others try to pick the winner.

I think you should pick someone you believe is wise and sees the world the way you do. Pick the person you trust the most. The problem is - it takes work to pay that much attention and it's hard to see the real person through the media. Still, we should try.