Asian Markets Fall Like Cherry Blossoms In Gentle Spring Rain

If you have not, you must check out "The Onion". The articles are great fun, but some of the headlines are precious. Here are some good ones:

Asian Markets Fall Like Cherry Blossoms In Gentle Spring Rain

Patriots' Season Perfect For Rest Of Nation

Online Dating Helping Pathetic Women Get Their Hopes Crushed More Efficiently

Scientists Discover Gene Responsible For Eating Whole Goddamn Bag Of Chips

Study: Use Of Phrase 'Don't Skimp On The' Linked To Heart Disease



Currency devaluation reflects silently on still and glassy water.