A quick ha

A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him.
The waitress asks them for their orders.

The man says, "A hamburger, fries and a coke," and turns to the ostrich, "What's yours?" "I'll have the same," says the ostrich.

A short time later the waitress returns with the order "That will be $22.60 please," and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change for payment.

The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, "A hamburger, fries and a coke."The ostrich says, "I'll have the same." Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change.

This becomes routine until the two enter again. "The usual?" asks the waitress.

"No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and a salad," says the man. "Same," says the ostrich.

Shortly the waitres s brings the order and says, "That will be $78.70." Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table.

The waitress cannot hold back her curiosity any longer. "Excuse me sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change in your pocket every time?"

"Well," says the man, "several years ago I was cleaning the attic and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it, a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes.

My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there."

"That's brilliant!" says the waitress. "Most people would ask for 10 million dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!"

That's right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, thee exact money is always there," says the man.

The waitress asks, "What 's with the ostrich?"

The man sighs, pauses and answers, "My second wish was for a tall chick with a big ass and long legs who agrees with everything I say."

Homework

Music data you have to pay attention to if you want to know what's going on. I'm so far removed from all of this, it's like a homework assignment just to get a clue.

Kiele ~ Magna Cum Laude

On Sunday May 18th, 2008 after four years of dedication and hard work, Kiele received her BA Degree in Graphic Design from Boston University's College of Fine Arts. She graduated Magna Cum Laude. Pretty cool huh?

Well done!

Technology Change Edge - A way to get in

There are situations where a business is required to invest in technology, and then employ the technology for the benefit of its clients (services) or its own output (product). When a company's tools become outdated, they have to upgrade if they want to compete. Sometimes, huge advances become available and change the way things work in a fundamental way.

It doesn't seem fair. The old company with an investment in older gear and an established "way" discovers that their assets are really only business relationships and a knack for knowing the ropes. Actual capabilities are easily replaced with better tools. At least the marketplace sees it that way.

In theses circumstances, a new company employing the latest and greatest stuff, can do new things, and do the old things better and cheaper. It's the critical period that surrounds large technical changes that give new players a perfect place to leap into business. No, they don't have the relationships (customers), but they have all new stuff and they can do more for less. That's enough to make something happen. Congratulations to the new player.

Of course, after a period of time the new player becomes the old player and...

So - old and new players - the point of entry and its relative advantages, teach us to be aware if we want to last.

Plan capital spending on technical capabilities (depreciation and need for new money) accordingly. Don't saddle yourself with financial obligations that will outlive your stuff. Depreciation is a real expense for you. Don't be silly - be ready. If you're a new player, look for the bend of a fundamental change and crush the old players before they can respond. Hey - that's life.

Some quotes~ art / artists

Have no fear of perfection, you'll never reach it.
- Salvador Dali

The essence of all art is to have pleasure in giving pleasure.
- Mikhail Baryshnikov

Nothing is more beautiful than a guitar, except, possibly, two.
- Frederic Chopin

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.
- Woody Allen

V1 is cool stuff

The listening room at Venue-One "V1" holds about 200 guests seated in comfortable chairs (more like your living room) around small tables. There are a few sections that are tiered and somehow everyone gets a perfect view of the stage. The experience is incredibly intimate. As crazy as it sounds, the listening room isn't really a part of the profit picture for V1 - not directly anyway. While performances are held on most Friday and Saturday nights, V1 doesn't really expect to make a whole lot of money in this category. Many shows are run in support of nonprofit causes. V1 will also book an act that normally wouldn't play a smaller room. V1 does this by paying the artist more - sometimes the artist gets paid more than V1 gets in ticket sales. They also serve up a steady stream of newcomers who need to play and be heard. V1 helps them show their stuff by giving them a sweet stage. Music, Comedy and other performing artists want to play V1's room.

One artists we talked to said, "The sound at V1 is incredible, the lighting and everything about it is as sweet as can be. They know how to do this right. I've recorded my last two albums in the V1 studios. I was so impressed by their dedication to what will help me that I'll do anything I can for them. It just feels good to be associated with V1."

V1's owners say that they do more for the artists than they get paid for. "It's good for the act, good for the community, and good for us in the long run. I mean, we need to be a place where people - the public and the artist - are served up some cool stuff. This is cool stuff."

Businesses include:

V1 Records
V1 Films
V1 Live
V1 Television
V1 Artist Management Group
V1 House of Gear
V1 Kitchen
V1 Advertising
V1 Financial Services
V1 Merchmonger
V1 Etc

Loaning Money & Getting Paid

Roll Rates:
A method to measure expected delinquency. The underlying assumption is that future accounts will continue to flow through delinquent buckets as they have in the past. Dividing the current month's delinquency bucket by the prior delinquency bucket, calculates the month's roll rates in the previous month.

Static Pool Analysis:
A pool of loans from a specific time period that has ongoing analysis conducted upon it. Analysis would examine such things as delinquency, prepayments and rate of return.

Vintage Analysis:
Similar to static pool analysis except that only delinquency and arrears are analyzed from a given pool of loans. This analysis provides insights about how delinquency for a pool of loans from the same time evolves. As well, changes in credit policy can be monitored using this method.

Boston Professional Sports

Okay, I'll give my take on the current state of Boston professional sports. Normally, I wouldn't comment on such matters, but so many seem to want to know what I think on this subject. That in itself is a crazy thing. Here we go.

Red Sox: Strong brand and competitive team. However, nothing will be likely to top the 2004 Yankee playoff series. Everything else is in second place. The season is long. The whittling down into September is interesting and the playoffs are fun. Who will have uninjured pitching when it counts? Still, we've seen the high point.

Celtics: Just shows you how a defensive effort in the regular season can influence winning percentage in the NBA. Most teams can only manage a dozen minutes of real defensive effort in a game. All of a sudden, the expectations are high. The team is probably as solid as the record indicates, and it's interesting to watch. It would be great to see a championship. Once again, the old days seem to look good. I feel old - maybe that's it?

Patriots: Too much said already. Management and coaching appear to be the major factors. Oh - and luck is a good thing too. I don't care who filmed who. Senator Spector should work on something else - really.

Revolution: Who cares? Not me. I maintain that if we can just eliminate offsides, the game will flourish in the USA. Think about it.

So that's my quick spew on this subject. Why my opinion matters, I have no idea. To the many of you who begged me to say something... There you go.

Doctor Evil Speaks

Some great lines:

"You're quasi-evil. You're semi-evil. You're the margarine of evil. You're the Diet Coke of evil. Just one calorie, not evil enough."

"One Million Dollars!"

"Throw me a frickin' bone here!"

"Welcome to my underground / volcanic / submarine. lair."

"Why make trillions when we can make...billions?"

"Let me tell you a little story about a man named 'Shhh'"

"www.Shhh!.com... .org

(trying to discreetly tell Mini-Me to leave.) "Alright it's getting crowded in here. Everybody out, everybody out. Not you Scott. Not you Frau. Not you Number 2. Not you Goldmember. Not you guys back there. Not you henchman holding wrench. Not you henchman arbitrarily turning knobs and making it look like you're doing something."

"You're the best evil son an evil dad could ever ask for."

"1 billion, million, fafillion, shabolubalu million illion yillion...yen."

"Zip it, ex zip it a, zippy longstockings, zip it, zip it good, subtitle: zip it, zuckle on my zipple, zip it, Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, exZIPIT A..."

Some Quotes for ye

For every complex problem there is a solution that is simple, neat, and wrong.
Unknown

Time is the best teacher. Unfortunately, it kills all its students.
Unknown

"We are like sailors who have to rebuild their ship on the open sea, without ever being able to dismantle it in dry-dock and reconstruct it from the best components."
Otto Neurath (1882-1945)

Tame The Beast

We spend a considerable amount of energy trying to eliminate chaos and get things in order (tame the beast). In business, it's a priority. We have to be aware of what's going on in order to manage it. In our personal lives, we try to eliminate complexity so we can find some peace.

What happens when you succeed? What if you discover that you have tamed just about everything? You've done a terrific job removing obstacles and eliminating most annoyances. Sounds good huh? You determine your own schedule everyday. You enjoy the freedom that simplicity brings. Oh sure, the sprinkler head may need to be replaced and you may have to call the irrigation company, and that sort of thing. But really, this is getting close. You got rid of everything that does not please you. You've been working towards getting "things" just the way you want them and now - it's here. You're pretty pleased with yourself now aren't you. Sweet huh?

Now what?

Enjoy this: La dee daa... Hmmm... La dee daa...

Okay - now what?

How about some complexity, or maybe a beast to tame?

Sounds good.

Who will / can / gets to?

Who will make the best cake?
Who will be the top model?
Who can get there first?
Who will last the longest?
Who gets the girl / boy?
Who sings best?
Who dances best?
Who can eat the most?
Who is funniest?
Who can lose the most weight?
Who can find the hidden treasure?
Who gets to bang the rock star?
Who has the best dad?
Who can take the most abuse?
Who can best use beets in the menu?
Who strips best?
Who will survive?
Who can haul in more crab?
Who...?

El Trabajo Films & MyTurnTV

Interesting stuff.

Knowns, known unknowns, unknown unknowns

Donald Rumsfeld was hammered for botching his handling of the situation in Iraq. He was also laughed at for his comments about how he and his staff considered information. The press made him out to be a loon. Maybe he is a loon, and laying the "known knowns" commentary out there didn't help. The quote was an odd thing for the public to digest. It seemed to suggest that he was dizzy or something.

I remember hearing it and thinking that it made perfect sense. I thought he was stating the obvious, and that maybe that was why people made faces. Here's what he said.

"There are known knowns. These are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say, there are things that we know we don't know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we don't know we don't know."

Okay. What's the problem here? Not only are the three positions stated clearly, they are also described for those of you who need a little more of the picture. In any situation, particularly in business - you have to be aware of what you know and what you don't know. If you aren't considering this, you'll need to be lucky to win. These three categories represent the universe of information. You should not be confused or amused by the concept. Think about it a little more. It's accurate and correct. Donald Rumsfeld may have botched his assignment. Maybe his cheese has slipped a little off his cracker, but his description of information awareness (knowns) is fine.

No way - No say! The big reveal

See Article

Sales of compact SUVs and compact passenger cars are up while larger vehicles and trucks are down.

No kidding? Really? No say? Who would have predicted that? Wow - the big reveal!

Job Remix

In any work situation people will have things they like to do and things they don't like to do. Over time, and left unchecked - the job will change shape to minimize its less pleasant aspects. After a while - your employee having decided what he doesn't like to do, will have fit his efforts comfortably into the new shape. The original recipe and quite possibly a key ingredient will get tossed aside. I'm not talking about improving a process by reviewing it and making an intentional change. I'm talking about wild weeds taking over our garden. Eventually, it's a mess.

It's management's fault if the employee's naturally occurring task remix erodes the effectiveness of the business. We have to be aware of what's going on, understand what pieces of the process develop resistance, and take steps to keep the original plan intact.

It doesn't mean the reshaping, or remixing of the job description and your business process were done maliciously, or even intentionally. This just happens to be the way it is with us humans. As management, if one of the things you avoid is tending to this issue, you'll end up with everyone performing their own customized (remixed) version of their job. Yes - you are human too. This is often the reason why people fail as managers. How ironic.

How I lost 10 Pounds in 53 Years

It might not be a great book, but I love the title.

Sales of Popecorn are down. Maybe it's the hat.

I must say - I'm a little disappointed with the Pope's hat. Given the tour, the entourage, the hullabaloo, the pomp, the whole Yankee Stadium thing, one would think they could come with something a little more swanky. Maybe go for a big statement look and add a feather. Whoever made the call on this one is in big trouble.

I guess he switches to this red number at some point during his gig. Perhaps it's just for the encore and the "final wave of the day" thing.

Frantically Constructing Another World

There's a good chance I've tossed this up before. Well, I've done it again.

"It is almost as if you were frantically constructing another world while the world that you live in dissolves beneath your feet, and that your survival depends on completing this construction at least one second before the old habitation collapses."

Tennessee Williams

Ted Williams

I've found that you don't need to wear a necktie if you can hit.
Ted Williams